Wellness Wednesday

My workout routine is up and going. I use the word routine lightly however. The evening walks are pretty routine but my resistance training isn't so routine. I do different things every day with some actual exercises thrown in. Most of my resistance training is what I'm going to call the mommy workout. It consist of playing horsey (bouncing my daughter on my legs with her sitting on my feet while i lift mu legs), airplane (letting my daughter "fly" on my feet in the air), walking around with my child attached to my leg, and other exercises that include my child. In addition to the "mommy workout" I'm trying to work my way up to some of these.

I do these activities every other day, walking once a day if I have a partner. 

I haven't really checked my actual number weight regularly, I don't have a scale remember, but when I have checked it it has fluctuated about two to three pounds. I do however notice a difference in my body and the way my clothes fit. Other people have seemed to notice it as well so I guess something is working. 

Im going to keep pushing forward with it and maybe soon I'll post a progress picture. 

My Health Journey (The Beginning)

For my first official Wellness Wednesday post I'm going to let y'all in on some of my deepest secrets. My weight, body image, and emotional health. 

First off I'm going to put it all out there so please don't judge but by being completely honest I need my readers to hold me accountable. 

To help me somewhat justify this I'm going to start off by saying I'm 27 years old, 5'7", and I just had a baby about three months ago. This would be my second child. My first child is 2 and nothing toward weight loss or getting healthy was really done in the time in between the two so I'm doubly catching up. 

My weight: 250 lbs 

There I said it. 

It's out there. 

Now you know. 

That number is already about 50 lbs lower than my pre-pregnancy weight from this last child. No weight gain during the pregnancy and i actually lost about 25lbs, the average GAIN for a pregnancy. I had really let myself go before getting pregnant, good thing I have an amazing hubby that loves me anyway. 

I don't really have a weight loss goal in mind just a weight loss period. 

I do have what I consider an ideal size for me but once I get there ill decide if that's really where I wanna be since everyone's body is different and looks and carries weight differently at different sizes. Not to mention I'm not even sure how my body will react after birthing two children. 

I'm not having any body image issues or anything it's just more about being healthy for myself, and my family. I've had body image issues in the past so I'm quite proud of being okay with myself now, but I do want to be healthy, have more energy, and be able to play with my girls for a long time to come. 

So far I've cut back on my portions, and we've been doing our evening walks you've already read about in a previous post. I don't own a scale at home so I'm not sure about actual numbers but I do feel a little better about my health from doing that for a little bit now.

As far as my emotional health I'm sure you all know by reading previous post it's not doing to hot. I have good days and bad days, things look up and then we get knocked right back down. When I put myself out of the situation it's actually pretty balanced as far as the good and bad, but when deep in the mist of it there is no way out, at least that I can see.

 I know most people say money isn't everything, but it is when you don't have any. It's a source to shelter, food, electricity, means of transportation, and even a stress relieve now and then in the form of a night out. 

I'm not in denial, I'm aware the not all my problems stem from financial problems, but I feel like those are the most prominent problems as of late. Now that hubby has started working part time for the company he will soon, hopefully, be full time with the money has started flowing back in little by little. Now it's the catchup game we play for the next few months. Catching up on bills we owe, people we owe for help with bills, and then working on the past debt again and start savings. 

So I guess all of that sums up to... Today is a good day. The light is getting slightly brighter, and I'm just trying to not get my hopes up about anything right now. 

I hope all of you, my readers, are well and happy in your lives right now. God Bless. 

Control

With everything going on lately and my wavering faith I have to find distraction just to make it through a day. Tonight's distraction, walking. I find since everything else in my life is out of control I can control that. It makes me feel like I've accomplished something whether its true or not. 

Plus the upside is maybe a little weight loss and my daily exercise requirement. I'm hoping to continue doing this. Usually we take two laps, tonight we did six. (I needed extra distraction).

A/C is on the fritz in my car and my front tires need replacing because they are showing metal. To make it worse my warranty just ran out on the car about a week ago. 

The light is fading as the minutes pass. You know the one. The light at the end of the tunnel. 

God must think I'm superwoman, he has more faith in me than I have in myself...or him for that matter right now. Depression is starting to take over and I feel like every day is a fight just to get out of bed. I use cleaning my house as a coping mechanism right now. One more thing I can have control over. 

I'm ready to get control of my life back, just not sure how to do that.